Settling in a New Country: Finding a New Rhythm

Moving Tip: As a family, finding balance in new cities like Macao, Italy, and now Qatar can be challenging but rewarding.

Settling into a new country is always an adventure, especially when you’re part of a family that’s always on the move. As a pilot’s wife, I’ve experienced firsthand the excitement—and the challenges—that come with creating a new routine in places as unique as Macao, Italy, and soon, Qatar. Each place brings its own rhythm, and finding that balance between work, family, and a new culture can be overwhelming. But it can also be incredibly rewarding.

Here’s how we’ve managed to adjust and find our groove in different parts of the world, along with some tips that have helped us settle in, no matter where we land.

1. Adjusting to New Time Zones and Work Schedules

One of the trickiest parts of moving to a new country is getting used to a new time zone. Add to that my husband’s unpredictable flight schedule, and it can feel like time is constantly shifting beneath our feet!

Time Zone Adjustment Tips:

Start adjusting early: Before the move, I start shifting our daily routine by an hour or so every few days. This helps ease the transition to the new time zone and reduces jet lag for all of us—especially for Frank, who’s still young and sensitive to big changes in his sleep schedule.
Be patient with your body clock: It can take up to two weeks for our bodies to fully adjust to a new time zone. In the meantime, I try to keep our routine as consistent as possible, especially around mealtimes and bedtime. In Macao, it took us about 10 days to settle into the new rhythm, while Italy was a bit easier because of the closer time difference.
Create a sleep-friendly environment: Whether we’re in the bustling city of Macao or the serene countryside in Italy, a dark, quiet room with white noise has helped us adjust to sleeping in new environments.

For my husband, adjusting to time zones is a constant part of his life as a pilot. Sometimes he’s landing just as we’re waking up, and other times, he’s trying to sleep during the middle of the day. We’ve learned to accept that not every day will look the same and that flexibility is essential to finding balance.

2. Creating a Home Routine Amidst the Chaos

As a family, it’s crucial to establish some sense of normalcy, even when everything around you feels new and uncertain. Building a daily routine not only helps ground us but also makes us feel more at home in unfamiliar surroundings.

Tips for Creating a Home Routine:

Morning Rituals Matter: No matter where we live, I try to keep our morning routine consistent. Frank and I have breakfast together, and even if my husband is on an early flight, I make sure to carve out some time for myself before the day starts. This small piece of normalcy is comforting when everything else feels unfamiliar.
Set Anchors in Your Day: With my husband’s unpredictable flight schedule, it’s important to anchor the day with activities that are non-negotiable. In Italy, we had afternoon walks through the local piazza, while in Macao, we’d always visit our favorite park. Now, as we prepare for Qatar, I’m already scouting out places that can serve as our daily “anchor”—whether it’s a nearby café or a family-friendly beach.
Create Time for Connection: Even when my husband’s schedule is all over the place, we make it a priority to spend time together when he’s home. Sometimes it’s just a quick breakfast before he heads out, but making these moments count helps us stay connected despite his demanding job. We also make sure Frank knows that Daddy’s schedule may change, but his presence at home is still a priority.
Stay Adaptable: One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned as a pilot’s wife is the importance of being adaptable. Some days, the routine just doesn’t go as planned. Flights get delayed, work runs late, or unexpected events pop up. On those days, I remind myself that flexibility is just as important as routine. Embrace the unpredictability while still keeping certain core activities—like family time or self-care—as non-negotiable.

3. Exploring and Embracing the New Environment

Once we’ve settled into a new country, one of the most exciting parts is exploring everything it has to offer. It’s important to strike a balance between creating a home routine and embracing the new culture and lifestyle.

Exploring Your New Home:

Get out of your comfort zone: In Macao, the language barrier was a challenge at first, but getting out of the house and interacting with locals helped us adapt much faster. Italy was a bit easier since I speak some Italian, but it still took time to feel comfortable navigating local customs. Now, with Qatar on the horizon, we’re preparing to embrace the cultural differences and immerse ourselves in the new environment.
Find a balance between old and new: While it’s important to explore and embrace your new surroundings, bringing familiar routines from home can help create a sense of stability. For example, when we moved to Italy, we brought along our favorite kitchen gadgets and continued our Sunday family dinners, which made the transition easier.
Build your local network: One of the best ways to find your rhythm in a new country is by connecting with other expats or local families. In Macao, we joined an expat group that introduced us to new friends and helped us feel more settled. I’m already looking into similar communities in Qatar where we can meet people who understand the challenges of moving and adjusting.

4. Self-Care Amidst the Change

With all the chaos of moving and settling in, it’s easy to forget about taking care of yourself. But self-care is essential to staying grounded, especially when everything around you is new and uncertain.

Self-Care Ideas for Settling In:

Create a personal space: In each new home, I carve out a little space that’s just for me—a cozy reading nook, a quiet spot to have my morning coffee, or a corner where I can unwind. This small sanctuary helps me feel at home, no matter where we are.
Establish a workout or meditation routine: Whether it’s going for a run or doing yoga, having a fitness routine can bring a sense of normalcy to your day. In Macao, I found a local yoga studio that helped me stay balanced. In Italy, we did family hikes, and in Qatar, I’m planning to find a local gym or outdoor space to stay active.
Take time to explore solo: While settling in as a family is important, I also make it a point to explore on my own. Whether it’s visiting a local market or enjoying a quiet coffee at a new café, these solo adventures help me recharge and feel connected to my surroundings.

Final Thoughts: Finding Balance in the Unfamiliar

Settling into a new country can be challenging, but it’s also a time for growth and adventure. As a pilot wife, I’ve learned that balance isn’t about sticking to the same routine day in and day out. It’s about creating a flexible rhythm that allows you to adapt to new time zones, work schedules, and environments while still maintaining a sense of home and normalcy.

From Macao to Italy and now to Qatar, every move has brought its own set of challenges—but also a wealth of rewards. By staying adaptable, embracing the new, and creating anchors in our routine, we’ve found a way to make each new country feel like home.

How do you find balance when moving to a new place? Share your tips and stories in the comments below!